Love, loss and loneliness

Sepi hati terjadi lagi
Mungkin sampai mati aku sepi
Biar senyum hadir di hariku
Namun ini hanya ada di bibir
Di bibir saja

Aku ini yang bisa mengerti
Walaupun yang lain mau mengerti
Namun berat beban di hidupku
Biarkan saja biar saja
Hanya ku yang tahu

Sejarah cinta dan hidupku
Penuh duri dan banyak ranjau
Butuh kesabaran yang penuh
Untuk tetap kuberdiri

Oh! ada saatnya kubicara
Bila hatiku t'lah bulat
Sepanjang ku bisa atasi semua
Aku tetap diam

“Don’t you feel lonely with just you and your daughter here?”

Back then, I was surrounded by many people. I was constantly meeting them. It was the loneliest time I ever felt. To keep myself not feeling that way, I ensured my mind was preoccupied. First it was the education, then the career together with professional exam, subsequently the lil one came along and I juggled between her and my career.

It was the hectic lifestyle that made me feel less lonely.

Somehow, being away from people, having time for myself, not having to meet people’s expectations, make me feel at peace. Through my girl’s eyes, I learn that simplicity is the key to love and happiness. For all what we went through and the things that we are blessed now, always the simple stuffs that bond us together. Walking together to school, hanging out at the park, saying “love you” while she’s busy playing with her games (wii/ds lite/pc) and expecting me to say it back, the hugs and cuddles whenever we can etc.

Your love and faith has brought us this far, and it will lead us further. And now, when you are about to celebrate your birthday, remember that you will always be my baby girl. May all your wishes come true. May all your prayers are heard. And yes my dear, if mummy gets married, you will have the honour to hold my veil.