Tuesday, June 17, 2008

Compartmentalising and lying

It was Father’s day on Sunday and funny enough, I stumbled into these two articles published on the same day:

1. Sex on demand:
A fubu is someone that you have a relationship with which is not committed, but if you want sex, he is there for you. But the fubu can be the partner of another person too.
This is the new age in which hedonism and nihilism reign supreme. Morality has been tossed into the rear seat. Pleasure has taken over the wheel and is taking young Malaysians on a wild ride on the fast lane.

2. Have a fine affair, Dad
Overall, 47% of married men are likely to get involved with someone else and 35% of married women. “They can’t all be bad people so, faced with these statistics, I set out to try to understand why so many perfectly decent men and women are unfaithful and identified 17 reasons why people have affairs.”
“It’s because they’re good people that they lie awake at night feeling guilty and scared, agonising about how to avoid hurting the people they care about,” Kirshenbaum says.
“and while women are better at lying, men are brilliant at compartmentalising. They think that if the infidelity was in Bradford with a waitress and they’ve brought the kids presents and the wife flowers, then it doesn’t count.”

One of the conversations I had with my girl friends is that, no matter where we are or how “posh” we appear, some things remain unchanged. Putting religion aside, some things are just against our values. Yet, we are always judged of being the opposite. If we treat ourselves with respect, then we earn the respect from others.

Oh well, call us romantic fools but I believe intimacy should come after love and respect. Even Doc Love aka Uncle Lee will agree on this.

Unless of course if the guy happens to be Patrick Dempsey. *LOL* *smack my own head*.


n|ns said...

i agree too! :)

U.Lee said...

Hi Ms Istanbul, interesting posting as well articles, one of my favourite topics, *wink*. Ha ha.
In everyman's heart there is a secret nerve that answers to the vibrations of beauty.
I love my past. I love my present. I'm not ashamed of what I've had, and I'm not sad because I have it no longer.
I guess, as the saying goes, the grass is always greener other side of the fence, or the neighbour's mangos sweeter, ha ha.
But having gone thru life, most people only dream about, having being burnt, roasted and bbq'ed, I today make one woman happy, a challenge I accept daily. And to hear my wife laugh is worth my present monasterial lifestyle.
Today I only look, admire, tease women, but I have drawn a line in the sand I will not cross.
Only a week ago I met the 'perfect 10' that had eluded me 45 years....and apart from being excited and thrilled about knowing her, it's just that, my buku of the missing link is now closed...I found her.

I have on top of my TV cabinet more than 500 cocktail sticks (i collected as a hobby all the years) in a big vase arranged to look like a flower of the days and nights gone by...but roughly I can still recognise which one Naomi or Salmah held to stir her cocktail drink, or Irene at Raffles Singapore etc...
My days of wine and roses are over...only one dream still remains, to meet, shake hands, have coffee with a beautiful 5'6' exotic lady in London whom I once dressed in a gold dress, *wink*.
Until that day.....you stay beautiful and don't forget the lipgloss, Lee.
ps, one of these days, I might, ha ha, bring out that beautiful gold dress again...but not to dress anyone, as it was, it will always be Ms Istanbul in it...maybe a fantasy of meeting on board a Gulfstream Corporate jet...

Ms Istanbul said...


yeah I know. If a true celebrity throws themselves to us, we surely break all rules!!! *LOL*

Ms Istanbul said...

Hi Lee,

Will definitely remember the gold dress. Ah, I hope one day I get to experience flying a corporate jet. That will be the day!

Temptation is always there but my good friend always points out the importance of virtues and values. People often complain of not being appreciated or keep getting the wrong type of partners. Then, they themselves engage into the mentioned activities.

Like my friend always says, if you want to do it, it is better to be with someone you care rather than just a person to fulfill your lust. My take, get a hobby! (that may include eyeing candy men while having coffee at a local cafe). *winks*