Tuesday, June 22, 2010

Bittersweet journey

Each time I get lost in my own thoughts, which occurs quite frequent lately, the young lady would ask, “what’s wrong, mummy? Are you thinking?”

A common excuse I normally give whenever I start to stare something blankly when in reality I am caught in my whirlpool of emotions. It is best not to dwell into it much, especially when you are around kids. Sometimes I distract by taking her into a world of ponies, fairies or teddies, creating a storyline fit for a bedtime session.
Occasionally I let myself be pulled into the vortex and share with her my thoughts, just like today.

As the date approaches closer, I sense strong emotions making their waves. Happy, sad, anxious, excited, melancholy; all mixed together in a blender that I feel I could burst a colourful flavour.

My mom once told me that whenever she had to travel abroad during her career, she wished that her children would be able to see what she was experiencing, and perhaps do more. Little did she realise that her wish was to be materialised someday and I wouldn’t be surprised if she feels a tinge of regret as the longing can be unbearable. It becomes even worse as the young lady confidently chats away with the grandma, reciting poem that makes her nan speechless. I fear tears roll each time my mother hears the chatterbox, a usual response of grandparents who have been deprived from the physical presence of their grandchild.

My dad on the other hand is more relaxed. Naturally he’d prefer that I continue staying here, perhaps knowing we have been coping well with the environment. From the stories he heard through family, friends and strangers (a small world indeed that he met random people who talked about us), he knew we were doing fine. As any parent, he’d like to see that we are leaving all these good things behind for something better.

Of course it is everyone’s wish whenever a decision is made. We hope for a good or better outcome. Sometimes things go our way, sometimes it doesn’t.

I have many reasons to stay. The wonderful school with caring teachers and great kids, our annual ramadhan and eid routine, trips to the museums, picnics at the park, coffee, four seasons in a day (ok, that’s a bit extreme), to name a few. This city has been kind to us. We started from nothing and built our lives to get to where we are now.

I choose to meet halfway. I wouldn’t want to wake up one day knowing I had an opportunity but I didn’t take it or at least try. I wouldn’t want to regret for missing a chance.

And so I choose this path which I hope will give me happiness and love that last for a lifetime.

Both me and mini B would like to thank you; our friends, blogger friends and silent readers, for accompanying us during our London journey. We hope you have enjoyed yourself as much as we did. It has been a bittersweet ride, an unforgettable chapter indeed.

You find no man, at all intellectual, who is willing to leave London. No, Sir, when a man is tired of London, he is tired of life; for there is in London all that life can afford ~ S. Johnson

Friday, June 11, 2010

Dresses dont lie

Two weeks to go and I have been keeping myself occupied with shopping rendezvous when in reality I should be focusing on the move. I think I've got most things covered. I've reached to a point where anything which is more than a year old or probably has less use or appeal will be given away. So far, a quarter of our things have gone to charity, a quarter to friends and family back home (toys, books and her fashionable outfits) and a fifth to the bin. I even have decided to leave it to the pro for this relocation where our things will be professionally packed and sail on a cruise which I can only imagine a five-star liner as the cost is higher than our flights.

Perhaps the stress is taking a toll on me as when I tried a few dresses yesterday, the sale assistant commented that I should try one size smaller. I quickly pointed out that they were the smallest in their range! She suggested I should check their youth section as they should have more sizes or different cutting.

A purple maxi dress got my attention and I took my usual size to the changing room. It was ok but another sale assistant took the liberty of getting a different fitting. Reluctantly I tried and when I came out, she was beaming with joy and said "now we found your size!"

It was UK size four....... sigh...

I cant wait for our two months break in Malaysia and indulge myself into lots of sinful food. Anyone care to be my ‘makan’ buddy? Momster perhaps?
Have a good weekend friends!

Tuesday, June 08, 2010

Who should marry him?

Watch the way the little girl plays with her hair. Such a natural flirt, eh? *grins* I bet it will be just a matter of time when the young lady asks to watch his concert. Probably I'll be more excited than her.

Sunday, June 06, 2010

Baby you make me wanna die. Where are my guns & horses?

Somehow these songs have made it to our hit list. Jenny from Gossip Girl is a version of 'Good girls gone bad', in a nice way of course. Her husky voice really goes well with this song. I wonder if she's thinking of a career change.

Ellie is another blondie with a unique voice. I find the music video a bit disturbing, a cross between The Vampire Diaries and Alice in Wonderland, hence I chose the live version for this purpose.

As for this tune, the young lady makes herself as an ipod, asking me to "hit play button" and she sings the song. Once, while waiting in line to get coffee, she caught the attention of many when she sang it wholeheartedly. I believe there are many young girls who are in the same boat. Apparently he's romantically linked to Miley. *rolling eyes*