Friday, November 03, 2006

In darkness, you shall find light

TD has always made me feel safe, that everything will be fine. His words have always calmed me. Despite his hectic schedule, he makes time for us, he takes time to listen.

He told me not to be hard on the little one. I know. Sometimes I think I’m too hard on her. I just don’t want her to be disappointed. I just want to be a responsible mother.

Maybe I’m being protective. I don’t want her to get hurt when people fail to meet her expectations.

Sometimes I have to be strict on her, often on solid grounds why I have to do so. But it hurts me back when I see her sad. Because each time I try to impose rules or restrictions, there is no one to console her. In a typical family, you have a disciplinary and a consoler. When a parent scolds the kids, the other parent will be the ‘good cop’. She doesn’t and I have to live with the guilt.

She knows why sometimes I have to be strict. I always explain to her why I was upset. For example, you need to learn to share things with your friends (even when they don’t), don’t push boys for no reason (only do that when it is necessary. Hehhehe), don’t waste your food (because some people don’t even have food on their plate).

I may pamper my girl like a princess but she must always remember to be humble. Despite raising her by myself, we are fortunate that I’m able to provide good things for her. Some single parents are not so lucky.

Each night, I spend some time with the little one chatting how our day went by. I’m open to her and we talk almost everything. From her crush on boys to finding a prince for me. Hmmm, I wish it was that easy ie shop for a prince. If only you can buy them in stores, selecting which qualities you want them to have.

I’m enjoying this journey, one step at a time.

Have a good weekend!

1 comment:

~Ibu Anggun~ said...

u r a great single parent :)